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help? am i in an abusive relationship?i thought love was suppose to accept your partner’s weaknesses?
i’ve been in a relationship with this guy who is two years older than me(i’m 17 btw) about 1 year++.
the thing is, he kinda always tell me what i should and shouldn’t wear, like for example last time he told me that i couldn’t wear mini skirts/shorts/dresses just because cellulitelulite and big calves:’( he even considered me as fat and told me that i must keep my hair long. worst, he even threatens me that he wouldn’t want to see me if i haven’t reduce my weight and get rid of the acnes on my face.i knew that i should’ve known better but i just want some opinion whether he is being concern about my looks or taking control of my life.what should i do with him?should i dump him?help:(
Suggestion by PEGGY S
Dump him. He is a controlling jerk, that does not love the person that you are. He wants to make you into something else. He is not the kind of guy that you need to be with. he will only make you miserable for the rest of your life, if you stay with him. No matter what you do, it will never be what he wants, because he is insecure and does not know what he wants. You will always be blamed for that.
Suggestion by XYZ
Learn to love yourself. And have some self respect. No one has a right to dictate you. Making suggestions is different. ( though i know this all is going to have little or no effect on you).
Suggestion by Megan Conner
DUMP HIM!!!!! No he isn’t concerned about you, he is treating you like sh**! You don’t deserve being treated like that whatsoever, you need to tell him where to go. If he really loved you, he would love you for who you are. If you were concerned about losing weight, he would try and help you, not put you down like that. No way would I stay with someone like that!!
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Dump Him!
He probably doesn’t love you. He is probably using you for popularity or something!
You Have rights too!
If you are the kind of person who wants revenge, try to give him a taste of his own medicine!
“Just The Way You Are” – Bruno Mars.
I am def. all for women and anyone for that matter feeling great about themselves.
with that being said, i wouldnt completely write off everything he says. for example, losing weight would be nice just for health issues.
HOWEVER, i would DEF break it off with him before he becomes physically abusive. I DEFINITELY think it is him crossing the line when he CONSISTENTLY tells you what to wear. at that point, you guys will not have a healthy relationship if he doesnt even respect you as a woman, enough to be alright with your body and not tell you what to wear.
although it may be hard at first; youll get over it eventually. Dump him
Hey, I think the thing to ask yourself in any relationship is this: On balance, does this person make me happy? If the answer is no (and in your case it sounds like it might be a very big NO) then it’s time to jettison that person. His behaviour isn’t going to get any better and it may very well get worse.
So hell yes! Dump him, spend some time on your own, find new interests, keep healthy, enjoy yourself, and in time you’ll find a new man who DOES make you happy.
You need to finish this relationship, he if trying to bring down your confidence by telling you that you are fat. I was in a relationship like this for six years and he used to beat me. do not let it get to this
The Freedom Programme
http://www.freedomprogramme.co.uk/
check this out, it will show you the many forms abuse can come in and how to recognise when you are a victim.
good luck
In my opinion,you should dump such guy.How long will you do whatever he tells you.Thank you.
Your on a slippery slope if you carry on seeing this guy. This is how it starts, he will then tell you how ugly you are and the only person who will ever want you is him. Your self esteem will hit rock bottom and you will genuinely start to feel as though you are ugly and you will feel grateful that he “loves” you. I suggest you get out now before it’s too late.
Dump him. He’ll always be that picky . You dont need that. Plenty more out there. Start getting tough and be assertive.
This is emotional abuse. Find someone who accepts you for who you are (without all the fault finding). You don’t need this kind of relationship. Your self esteem will erode in until possibly you don’t think you deserve any better.